‘House’ needs to get out of the hospital

If I’m suffering from some sort of unpronounceable -itis that has me bent over in pain, I’m making a “House” call pronto. If, however, I’m looking for a television series that understands that it needs to evolve, I’m searching for an alternative provider.

“House” is the most compelling reason to watch anything on Fox that’s not titled “American Idol.” With smart writing and consistently nuanced performances, it’s both a critical hit and ratings winner. But as season two prepares to wrap on May 23, “House” could use a multivitamin.

Viewers have seen plenty of cranky doctors before — William Daniels was so wonderfully miserable as cantankerous heart surgeon Dr. Craig in “St. Elsewhere” that he was nominated for five Emmys and won twice. On “House,” Hugh Laurie’s bad bedside manner ranks up there with Craig’s. The two would make a perfect medical partnership: the offices of Smart Ass and Super Ego. Please fill out your insurance information and medical history before seeing the doctor, and don’t dare question anything they prescribe.

House’s antics have served the show well, but it’s time creator David Shore gives his supporting players something more to do than make consistently wrong diagnoses and stumble over each other’s mistakes.

There’s a reason series like “CSI” and “Without a Trace” score such high Nielsen numbers. In every episode the cases are self-contained, meaning — for the most part -—there’s not a lot of storyline carryover. These procedurals, as they’re referred to in the television business, make great business sense. New viewers don’t feel as if they're trying to play catch-up and aren’t intimidated if they’re tuning in to an episode in the middle of the season. For all the glowing reviews and cult status of “Lost,” is there anyone who would dare check it out now for the first time without never seeing an episode? It's difficult to build a new viewer base with such a dense backstory.

Quit wrapping everything up in one show
But syndication dollars be damned. “House” needs to go beyond wrapping up every case at the end of the alloted hour and, more importantly, stop every supporting player from sublimating their own personalities to please the good doctor.

Tune in to any episode and witness the same old, same old: Seemingly healthy person suffers mysterious massive medical trauma before the opening credits; a reluctant and dispirited House is forced to deal with the new case after the first commercial break; doctors Foreman (Omar Epps), Cameron (Jennifer Morrison) and Chase (Jesse Spencer) squabble over a diagnosis as the patient gets sicker and sicker. Ten minutes before the hour ends, a light bulb suddenly goes off in House’s head and, presto, a correct diagnosis is made. Problem solved. End of episode. Roll credits. Previews of next week’s medical mystery unfold.

The few attempts to move outside this box have brought mixed results. It was hard for viewers to buy the relationship between House and the stunningly gorgeous Sela Ward, who played the doctor's old flame, Stacy Warner. Whatever she saw in him was never defined unless, of course, she was into a serious case of self-abuse at the hands of a callous and uncaring partner.

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