Many women fake their feelings in order to either please or hold onto their partner. They may feel they can never be grumpy or cranky and that they will only stay loved if they are sweet and loving 24/7. Sometimes women aren't even honest with themselves about how they feel because they fear their true feelings will leak out.

Of course, the most common “faking” issue is ... faking an orgasm.

Most women have faked an orgasm sometime in their life. Not only that, but they have most likely faked being aroused.

There are many reasons women fake it. Most women will tell you it is to please their partner. Women feel tremendous pressure to preserve their partner's ego and fear he will be crushed if they don't have an orgasm.

Women also think that in order to hold onto their man — to keep him from finding a more satisfying partner — they have to appear very hot in bed, which they believe translates into having an orgasm all the time.

Some women fake it for other reasons. They are self conscious about the length of time it takes them to climax. Rather than being uninhibited about how long it may take them, or how much stimulation they may need, a woman may choose to just fake it so she doesn't have to "expose" her needs to her partner.

"WOMEN AND SEX" Here's what we're covering in Dr. Gail Saltz's special "Today" series: MONDAY (Part 1): "I'm just not interested..." TUESDAY (Part 2): "Should I fake it?" WEDNESDAY (Part 3): "I don't feel attractive..."

Other women may not know how to have an orgasm. They feel very inhibited and have not been able to explore what works for them, or tell their partner how to help them. This group will often fake orgasms to avoid revealing what feels like a "defect" in their body.

The problem with faking it is that it becomes a vicious circle. Once you fake it, your partner believes that he is satisfying you and you are happy. Therefore, he has no reason to try new things or ask if you'd like something else.

At the same time, you may be feeling increasingly angry at missing out on a positive sexual relationship. You may also feel hopeless about ever getting to experience what you are missing. The angrier and more dejected you feel during sex, the less likely you will ever feel arousal, only dread.

Should you ever fake it? In a nutshell, NO!

Some women describe on occasion that they don't feel like expending the energy it may take them to have an orgasm on a particular night. In this case, do not fake it! Instead, tell him that orgasms are not everything, and that sometimes the closeness and intimacy of sex is just what you are in the mood for. In other words, be honest.

So what can you do if you have been faking it and now feel stuck?

1: Tell him, without hurting him.
If you tell him, "All our great sex for the last decade, well ... I've been faking it," he will, understandably, be hurt and devastated. Instead, tell him you have been having more difficulty achieving orgasm lately and would like to experiment with some new things. Then, only moan and groan if you really feel it. It takes the pressure off you, and then you can start to relax.

2: Give specific directions.
You have to start communicating to him what you want — and be specific. He's not a mind reader. Tell him: "To the right, that's great, a little softer…."

3: Give yourself more time.
It does take more time for women to have an orgasm. Don't be in a race to beat the clock. If you're in a rush, you might cave and fake it again. If you ask him, he'd probably say he would be happy to work at it with you all night. Many women are concerned that their partner will get bored because it takes you longer, or that he's wondering if something is wrong with you. These are your thoughts, not his. Most men find sex to be loads and loads of fun and would be pleased to spend as much time with you as you would like.

4: Educate yourself.
Learn about your own body and what works for you. Then you can tell him what you want.

5: Communicate.
Tell him that orgasm is not the only goal for you in lovemaking and that sometimes you are really quite content to enjoy the affection and closeness. Make it clear you will let him know if you do want to have an orgasm.

In the end, if you are able to stop faking it and relax and enjoy yourself, then this can bring both of you closer together.

Dr. Gail Saltz is a psychiatrist with New York Presbyterian Hospital and a regular contributor to “Today.” For more information, you can visit her Web site, www.drgailsaltz.com.

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